Action Movie Fanatix Review: All-Star Superman

All-Star Superman banner

Starring: James Denton, Christina Hendricks, Anthony LaPaglia

Director: Sam Liu

2011  |  76 Minutes  |  PG

“My fortress is only for those closest to me.” – Superman

Now, I am generally not a huge Superman fan but I also haven’t given the character a fair shake in years.  I never used to like the Superman comics, the Christopher Reeve Superman movies were pretty hit & miss for me and Superman Returns was all miss.  With Man of Steel coming it was time that I give ole Supes another chance.

While saving the crew of the first manned mission to the sun, Superman is poisoned by solar radiation.  Dying, he decides to fulfill his lifelong dreams while still saving the Earth from varying threats.  When Lex Luthor reveals his latest plot to control the world, Superman must use his last remaining strength to stop him.

So, this is kinda like Superman’s bucket list with some random super-fights thrown in there.  And as it turns out, Superman’s bucket list is super boring.  I guess if you can fly, shoot lasers out of your eyes, get shot by bullets without getting hurt, blow really hard, blow really cold and see and hear really far you just want the little things in life.  Little things like flying to another planet in a matter of seconds to pick alien flowers for Lois.  Creating Superwoman serums for Lois.  Planning a dinner date with Lois in Atlantis.  It watches like the writers just pulled ideas out of their asses and put it to paper.  There is even a part where we are introduced to Superman’s sun eating plant pet thing.  Then when a bad guy, who actually is a sun, emerges Superman unleashes his planty friend to eat it up.

I haven’t read Grant Morrison’s original 12 part comic book series but hopefully it isn’t this bad.  The fact that a 12 part series was compressed down into a 76 minute movie could be a big part of the problem.  I assume that this is the reason that the entire story feels like a bunch of random scenes thrown together for a while.  Too many ideas in a very short amount of time.

The animation is OK but it has a hint of anime and I don’t like it.    Plus the animation does that shifty kinda thing.  You know what I am talking about.  When the animation is so poorly done that things appear to shift back and forth on screen.  It is only really noticeable in a few parts but I expect a lot better in a release like this.

The voice work is probably the best part about the movie.  Everyone sounds right… even if they are delivering some of the corniest lines they had ever read.

There was some cool cloud effects at the end though…  That is a plus I guess.

In case you couldn’t tell, I really couldn’t stand All-Star Superman.  My hatred of this movie doesn’t even take into account my general dislike for the Superman character.  I must have rolled my eyes at it at least 76 times (once per minute by my calculations).  The dialogue is so cheesy and the characters so bland that I just never cared.  On top of that the story jumped from one random idea to the next so quickly that none of it makes any impact on the overall story.  I can’t even imagine Superman fans enjoying this.  It is just that bad.

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